Recently, I was reminded of something very important. Love is a choice.
This is something I know deep inside. I've learned it the hard way, written about it, talked about it. But in the midst of day-to-day difficulties, it is frighteningly easy to become distracted from such an important truth.
You see, God chose to send His Son to earth to die for my sins. Then Jesus chose to die an agonizing and humiliating death on the cross, a punishment reserved for the worst of criminals, in order to save my soul. It was my sins that nailed Him there. He would've done it even if I was the only person that needed saving. He could've refused. But He made a choice to love me that much because He is LOVE.
And so, I owe it to Him to choose to love.
That applies to marriage, and not just when we feel head-over-heels in love. This is something that has to be in action all the time.
In a blended family like ours, remembering this is even more important. Only one of my children grew within my womb, under my heart. Only one was nursed by me, in that tender bond between baby and mother. I loved her from the moment of conception, and I knew the very day that occurred. By the time she was born, I was deeply in love with her. Since that time, I have held her when she cried, comforted her when no one else can, and kissed my fair share of boo-boos. Our bond goes deep.
In a blended family like ours, remembering this is even more important. Only one of my children grew within my womb, under my heart. Only one was nursed by me, in that tender bond between baby and mother. I loved her from the moment of conception, and I knew the very day that occurred. By the time she was born, I was deeply in love with her. Since that time, I have held her when she cried, comforted her when no one else can, and kissed my fair share of boo-boos. Our bond goes deep.
I didn't know my other two children until they were teens. One is already an adult. He has never needed me to kiss a boo-boo or hug him when he was sad. It is only in the past few months that I've done anything "motherly" for him, though those acts have simply been things like doing his laundry or making sure he wakes up in time for class. I love him, but it is a different kind of love, and it's unfair to compare one type of love to another. I've often heard parents say that they love each child differently, but they don't love one more than another. This is new to me, but I am learning.
My other child has been in my life for only about six months. Already, I have held her when she cried; I have comforted her and stroked her hair and told her I love her; I've been working to earn her trust, all while learning to trust her. This is yet another kind of love. One can't be compared to the other. But they all have something in common: I must make a choice daily to love even when it's hard. Because love is hard. In this instance, "hard" is defined as difficult, tough, challenging, baffling, strenuous, and sometimes uncomfortable.
But I want to love hard, and in this case "hard" is defined as truly, undeniably, mightily, conscientiously, zealously, doggedly, wholeheartedly, and enthusiastically (which, by the way, means "inspired by God").
But I want to love hard, and in this case "hard" is defined as truly, undeniably, mightily, conscientiously, zealously, doggedly, wholeheartedly, and enthusiastically (which, by the way, means "inspired by God").
In challenges we face daily, it can be very easy to forget -- but this is far too important. This commitment to love has to come anew each day, just like the decision to follow Christ every day. As for me and my house -- and my heart -- we will serve the Lord, and we can do that by choosing to love hard.
